The country of YouTube is under siege by an army of anonymous warriors wearing V for Vendetta masks. Reports from YouTube’s capital Schmidtville describe a city on the verge of panic and disorder. In the message disseminated to a group of 1.8 million anonymous followers, the war is being fought in protest of YouTube’s unfair decision to publically execute Lukey Wes, a pudgy 12 year old YouTubian who violated provincial bylaws. As detailed in the poster, members of anonymous are kindly being asked to participate in attacking YouTube with corn, lots and lots of corn. While there have been initial reports of random corn in YouTube, the main assault is scheduled to start tomorrow, January 6, 2010.

YouTube’s Laws

“Out of all the modern countries in today’s world, only YouTube permits public executions without a proper judicial process,” says Professor Jennifer Wilson, a historian from Yale University. “YouTubians can be dragged out of their beds in the dark of night, jailed, and publically executed. While most victims of these practices are adults, Lukey was the first juvenile to suffer the cruel fate of death.”

Kate Greenburg saw the execution first hand. “It was horrific. Absolutely horrific. They dragged that poor boy and all his belongings into Schmidtville’s town center. A guy wearing a mask approached him with a huge blade and cut the poor [inaudible] poor child right open. Another executioner threw Lukey’s body into a raging bonfire along with all of Lukey’s belongings.”

Revenge

When news of Lukey Wes’ execution spread outside of YouTube, Lukey immediately became a martyr, a king, even a God to some folk. Many anonymous found this act distasteful and downright disgusting. Many more dropped what they’re doing and joined the fight. “We will avenge him.”

January 6, 2010 is right around the corner.

Update

Intelligence reports point to a 9PM GMT strike. Spectators of the epic battle in the United States should tune in at the following times:

• 4PM Eastern Time
• 3PM Central Time
• 2PM Mountain Time
• 1PM Pacific Time