“Red, with white trim”, said Jeanette Miller. “Purple”, chimed in Cassandra Evans. Women across America have begun to announce the color of bra that they are wearing at any given moment without any prompting or coaxing whatsoever. Curious males no longer need to put forth the same investigative effort that they once used to – merely being a bystander is enough nowadays.

Ostensibly, this movement is in support of charity – the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation – but most women polled do not seem to be aware of this underlying purpose. “I say it to people even before I greet them – sometimes I don’t even greet them”, said Margaret Chapman. “I giggle a little when people look at me all confused,” she added. And she confesses that the embarrassment of saying “white” every day has convinced her to buy a new palette of bras to talk about.

Though women are laying the colors on thick, some people remain oblivious to the concept. “I had no idea why my wife was saying ‘red’ to me all day long until that night when we were in the bedroom,” said Josh Richter, adding, “she was not amused.”